Write ten sayings for fortune cookies.


1. “You will find a great deal of money and hot women if you keep buying fortune cookies.”

2. “You will be getting diarrhea shortly from that sweet and sour chicken you just ate.”

3. “It’s not the pants, you are just fat.”

4. “You will be skeptical about whatever fortune cookies tell you.”

5. (Exclusive to Los Angeles) “You will have a parking ticket on your car upon leaving this establishment.”

6. “Good health will be yours for a long time… if you never eat here again.” (Exclusive for Panda Express stores.)

7. “Vague general statement that could apply to anyone in any situation.”

8. “You’re life is like the Truman Show. Seriously, you are not just paranoid, everyone IS watching you.”

9. “Don’t worry, the dog barking you heard from the kitchen is just the owners pet.”

10. (From 2006) “You will regret buying those crocs in a couple years.”

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